I'm not a writer but I do try, I just had the thought that perhaps I should write about families, or close friends and their impacts on the huge decisions that one makes as this is relevant for me now, and hey, maybe it may be, have been, or will be relevant to you.
Now I find that if we have family or a circle of close friends, they know us reasonably (sometimes very) well and so when we're going to make a huge decision or we're confused about something, it's only natural that we ask for their opinion on the matter or even their advice, isn't it?
Honestly, I think these close ones are probably the worst people we could ask for advice sometimes, why? Because they're scared to see us get hurt. These people care so much about us, I find that nine times out of ten, they'd opt for the 'safe option'? They'd tell you to go along the path with the least bumps that's least likely to get you hurt and you'd have to struggle less for because it's safer, easier and unlikely to cause problems... but guys, is ANYTHING good in life easy? The best things in life are those you worked your arse off for. Maybe the complex route is hard but it's meant to be, if it's hard it's going to be worth it. If you feel like you should do it, and something is meant to be, it's because it is.
The paradox I've found in all of this is that these people that strive so hard for us not to get hurt are the ones who's advice ends up hurting us the most, cause we follow the easy option. If we listen, we settle and ignore our gut instincts and every fibre of our being because we've been told by family or friends "you're too picky" or, "you've got this opportunity now, take it!" And through doing this, we ignore what our heart is telling us. Then we truly do suffer indeed because we fall victim to regret which is one of the worst things ever- Who wants to live their life saying 'what if?'. We stay wrapped up in what could be, we are faced with the disappointment in the knowledge that we've settled and we didn't have the courage to pursue our heart's desires.
"It's outrageous" , "it's impossible", "but what if I fail?" Is it worse than if you don't try at all? Is it worse than "I could have done it", "What if I did this differently", "I really wish I'd tried...". Your gut instinct will lead you on the right path and help guide you through. However, your head and those trying to help advise you and make your life easier will cause you to doubt yourself and doubt the right decisions for you, and if you're not strong, eventually you'll ignore your feelings and end up not going after what you truly want. Are you really going to let that happen and lose out on something great?
We only have one life, surely that fact alone's enough to shock people into realising that we simply cannot waste time falling behind in what could have been. We can't spend our life wrapped up in working... losing one dream in pursuit of another. We've got to do everything we want (within reason) and listen to our gut instinct. If you feel it, it's right, and that's what I live by and you should too, because I believe our gut instincts are how our angel's and guides communicate with us and we should listen, but even if you don't believe in any of that stuff, surely our feelings are there for a reason? When you feel you should do something, for a profound, inexplicable reason other than you just felt you should, and you got those tingles? That means you should most definitely go ahead and do it. And if you've ever listened to those feelings, I'm sure you've never missed out and you've discovered something or done something great. In the same way that if you just feel something isn't right, or you have a slight feeling of uncertainty before you've done something, they you go ahead and do it, it'll have probably not had the result you'd hoped for or not been what you wished for because you already knew it wasn't right.
The thing is, part of conquering your inner demons and following your life path properly, making the best decisions or having the best life you can is sometimes not listening to what everyone says all the time and starting to trust in you and your feelings and instincts. Heck, friends, family, they can be really supportive about one unorthodox thing but not so much about the other, "stay closer" or "that's impossible" or "you're a dreamer" can be things you can hear a lot from those close to you but if you really feel like you want to do something, your mind keeps drifting back to it, or it may even be something you can't go a day without thinking about they how on earth could you even contemplate ignoring it, and denying yourself happiness to please others? It's your life, not their's and you can't always play life easy... You've got to understand sometimes you have to take risks. If you have a good strong unit of friends and family, they'll support you no matter what and if they don't still have faith in yourself if it's what you feel you're meant to do.
Just listen to your gut, if something gives you the tingles, you've felt no negativity about it, and it feels like something or something you should pursue then don't let anyone including yourself get in the way of it unless you want to be unhappy and spend life kicking yourself over it.
So whatever it is, being something or someone if you feel it, you're passionate, it makes your heart beat fast and you can't go a day without thinking about it, go grab it, no matter what anyone says... You can reward them with your happiness later and do the whole "I TOLD YOU SO" routine! When you finally get what you wanted through you may have had to ignore family and friends' advice or self doubt, those nights you've spent up, those times when you've woken up at like 4 or 5 in the morning... All the effort and work, it'll all be worth it. Because as I said before and I will say again, nothing in this life is easy, but it'll sure as hell be worth it. Opportunities never last very long so cease them when you can.
Take care & good luck, if your family and friends don't support you, I do!
-Dalanda xx
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