Today's mantra

Im sorry, there's a bit in the middle that isn't very clear I've tried for ages to change it but

it isn't working, please highlight it to read it, it's important. :o) - well, only if you wish to...

Painting by Pablo Picasso. 

I think we all find ourselves guilty of that... I think hey, maybe if I just get through today with enough hope, my dreams will come back to me tomorrow. Maybe tomorrow I'll have the motivation, the luck. But so far it's seeming like that tomorrow never comes. But fool that I am, I'll keep hoping... Maybe soon good things are coming and in the time being I'll try my best to enjoy life because it is a blessing, even if sometimes you feel as though you've been cursed. Our lessons are what makes us stronger and every cloud has a silver lining... Or golden, because I prefer gold. Silver washes me out. But I digress...

This quote kind of reminds me of the very end of Fitzgerald's The Great Gatsby. 

'Gatsby believed in the green light, the orgastic future that year by year recedes before us. It eluded us then, but that’s no matter—tomorrow we will run faster, stretch out our arms farther. . . . And then one fine morning—
So we beat on, boats against the current, borne back ceaselessly into the past.'

These words conclude the novel and find Nick going back to the theme of the significance of the past to dreams of the future, which is represented by that green light. He focuses on the struggle of human beings to achieve their goals by both transcending and re-creating the past. Yet humans prove themselves unable to move beyond the past: in the metaphoric language used here, the current draws them backward as they row forward toward the green light- their dreams. This past functions as the source of their ideas about the future (epitomised by Gatsby’s desire to re-create 1917 in his affair with Daisy) and they cannot escape it as they continue to struggle to transform their dreams into reality. While they never lose their optimism (“tomorrow we will run faster, stretch out our arms farther . . .”), they expend all of their energy in pursuit of a goal that moves ever farther away. This metaphor characterises both Gatsby’s struggle and the struggle of some dreams themselves, notably the American dream in the context of this great novel. 

It's so true... so many people romanticise the past or stick with negative things and/or situations in their lives that pull them back like those strong waves. Waves of sadness, regret and things that you need to release but you cling to firmly and go on and on like the waves... Letting yourself fight until you're tired and just sit back and allow yourself to drift further and further away from that green light that you truly want in your life or need to complete you. 

You talk yourself out of jumping on the boat to save yourself and instead choose to suffer fighting a losing battle, and why? Why can't we have the courage to go after our dreams anymore? The dreams that truly scare us yet fulfil us so much at the same time? Sometimes you've just got to take the first step to make it happen. Look it in the eye and go after it, don't turn away, don't ignore it if it's something you think about everyday. If it's something your heart drifts to. Don't let your false dreams, your past or your failures  rob you of your future. There's nothing worse than standing there watching, realising you have what you wanted but you didn't have what you needed so it's like everything has turned to shit because you ignored what was truly the most important thing to you. There's a quote for that too in TGG " The loneliest moment in someone’s life is when they are watching their whole world fall apart, and all they can do is stare blankly." Don't be that person. It's really not nice. 

Here's a hint- those things of true importance will never be your obligations. Career or work goals and life goals are different. All goals are important and you shouldn't ignore any. They are part of your superficial happiness but are usually socially constructed by the lives we are told to live. 

  I'm quite tired now but I think you understand. I hope you do because all of this is important... I just really want for us all to be happy, to have joy in each other and for each other because that is when we see true contentment and true happiness. If you don't know what to do or how to do it, look at my old posts (I'll change the format in a bit so you can see archives) or ask yourself- you have the answer, I promise you that you do but you've told yourself you don't because you're scared... It's not easy, I know but the most blatantly obvious and clear thing is what you should do. Relax and the answer will come to you. Try not to overanalyse everything... You're just stirring up the current or in some cases swimming away from that green light with your body when your soul is still fighting towards that beautiful light. Follow your soul. Then you will know what happiness really is and it's so much better and more fulfilling than finishing a job. You realise this, you know, your soul knows, and yet still you do nothing? My dear one, it's time to change that. 

Be kind, be generous and be courageous. 

I love you and I hope the words I am sharing with you help you and inspire you and mean as much to you as they do to me. I try the best that I can for you all and I just hope that you've been able to make positive changes in your life because as I said I just really want happiness for all of us and if you can bring that, why not? You're all my friends here, even if you don't speak to me.  I feel you and I pray for you and I love you always. You're not alone, I promise. I'm here for you even if you're not here physically for me. :-)

Take care of yourself,

-Landi 

Here's an old kiss I forgot to share with you

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